Issue #89 — Oh That Burnin’ Feelin’
“Since the house is one fire, let us warm ourselves.” –Italian Proverb
In the past I have gone to sleep in a number of different capacities. I’ll make a cup of Sleepytime Tea. I’ll write in my journal of the days escapades. Perhaps I’ll pull one off before reading a little Tolstoy. In the past, when I used to go to sleep after Canucks lose, it was with the agony of a parent who’s child was just killed in a house fire.
And oh how that burning feeling has returned.
It’s unnecessary to get into “who didn’t show up” or what ails a first place team, leading in every major statistical category, with nothing left to play for. The best team in the regular season dropped two straight to the worst team in the league, the befuddling Edmonton Oilers. That is a fact. If this were a playoff situation (which is in clearly not) the Canucks would find themselves down 2-0 in the series. But none of that matters. Just like all the players on the team have been insisting all season, none of the regular season accolades and hardware are pertinant to a team that has it’s sights set on one goal.
That which we shall not speak of.
The Canucks are clearly unhappy with the outcome of the past few tilts. But it doesn’t actually matter. REALLY, it doesn’t matter. (Say that to yourself ten times fast under your breath dear reader.) What matters is that thing. So until that fat lady comes a–singin’ all bets are off.
And about those children we lost in the fire. I’ll reserve that nuclear holocaust in my gut until further notice.
Tell yourself. (Over and over again under your breath dear correspondant).
–Joseph F. Delamar
Editor’s note: Does anyone know this girl? Is she single? Does she like short walks on long beaches in just hockey socks and a wet translucent “away” jersey?